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A Serious Thought [May. 27th, 2005|11:17 am]
Out of the hundreds of people I see in a night, sometimes it is a sobering thought to reflect on statistics... Out of the many people that I help during one shift, there are people who've been beaten at home by their husbands. There have been kids that were molested. Girls who were forced to have sex. Someone in that line is probably high on something. There's always someone coming through drunk. There's the smelly guy who probably doesn't have a place to live. Then there's the smokers and chewers who buy their poisons in front of their kids who ask, "Mommy, isn't that stuff bad for you?"

There are people driving through on their way to a wedding or funeral. There are people who don't have cars or jobs. They have food stamps and they're buying junk food cause it lasts longer. They're going through a divorce. They're on their way to get laid. There's the sixth graders who are hanging out at the store till midnight cause they have nothing else to do and then they'll walk home over two miles in the dark.

Sometimes, we have to think about the people we see - everyone has a background and a story.
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More Fun T-Shirts [May. 27th, 2005|11:15 am]
- The short, balding, slightly pudgy pasty man in the well-worn white tank top which proudly claims he is "Paul Mitchell Styled."

- "Sorry Girls, I Love Cock" (worn by a 20-something male)

- "I Have the Dick, I Make The Rules" (by a very large nearing-30 female)

Those were from just one shift.
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Drunken Date Finder [Apr. 24th, 2005|05:07 pm]
Hello friends and lovers! Be prepared for up and comping updates about more of my strange retail-based existence!

Today's headline..."Strange Man Asks Me Out."

Stranger: (staring at me while I ring up his two items) "Want to go out sometime?"
Me: "Um, no, thanks."
Stranger: "Are you sure?"

Response #1: "Yes, I'm sure. See, I don't date men."
Response #2: "Quite sure."
Response #3: "I'm sure my boyfriend wouldn't like it."

Which option did I go with?Collapse )
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A Job Offer [Aug. 25th, 2004|05:44 pm]
Events Transpired As Of Yesterday:

Me: "Your total is $43.21."
Customer: "Can I get a good-guy discount with that?"
Me: "Absolutely. *customer looks up in surprise* Your new total...is $43.21."
Customer: "Ha! *smiles and writes check*"
Me: *whispering* "It just won't show up on the reciept because otherwise I'd get in trouble."
Customer: *grinning* "Would you be interested in a job with commission?"

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Offend Me, Thou Dost [Aug. 10th, 2004|12:41 am]
[mood |annoyedannoyed]

So, I still didn't think it could get any worse.

Then tonight, I get the middle-aged guy in a black shirt with a naked demon performing graphic fellatio on another demon, with the words "Horny Little Devil" in bright red illustrating what is already obvious.

People are so uncouth.
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(no subject) [Aug. 8th, 2004|04:24 pm]
Set Up Scene:

I come back from break, ask the manager if I can use the front restroom quick since back ones were full. She agrees. I leave.


I come back, hand her my key to get my till drawer back. As she's turning the key, I casually *comment about how the key and all my pens fell out of my vest into the toilet.


The look was priceless.


* Didn't really happen ;)
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Why Must Thou Offend So? [Aug. 7th, 2004|10:30 pm]
[mood |apatheticapathetic]

Two days ago, I thought it couldn't be any worse. A "gentleman" came through my register with two small children. That wasn't the problem.

What was the problem was the shirt he was wearing. It depicted a very accurate and colorful illustration of a man having doggy-style sex with a sheep as an advertisement for a bar in Montana - "Where Men Are Men and Sheep Are Sluts."

Then tonight, an underage kid walks in with a huge ugly nose ring and a shirt proudly stating, "I Have The Dick, I Make The Rules."

Why do people insult so? Why?
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Creepy Receipt Guy [Aug. 7th, 2004|12:37 am]
This was most bizarre, and I have yet to hear a similar tale...

Tonight, a gent came through, bought two 2 Liters of cheap pop and some nonsense items (light bulbs, I think). Total was under $20. Then, out of nowhere, he gives me a very fast, very double-talking speech about how he needs me to sign his reciept after he 'documents' some things on it...

I think, "Okay, strange, but not so strange..."

He goes to the till next to mine and starts scribbling on his ticket. I ring up the next two customers while I'm waiting. Then, he has to go to the bathroom. Right now. Where is it?! I point him off in the direction of said facility, and ring up one more person. Within two minutes, he's back. Considering that the bathrooms are at the other end of the store, I found that very odd, but what do you do?

So, he gets done writing after *four* more customers. He hands me the note and wants me to initial it and sign it for "business reasons." The entire reciept is covered with scribbled notes - top to bottom. There's a code next to each of his six items, and No *scribble* written about nine times below all that. I asked if it was something I was supposed to read, and he said, no, it's just to document that I had no other purchases. The hell? So, he wants me to sign his "contract."

Yeah, right. I put my name and store employee number on it (since my number is on it already and my name is on my vest) and he gives me another fast-paced speech about 'business expenses.'

Very, very creepy, and I'm not even sure why...
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When You Baby a Customer...They May Turn on You... [Aug. 2nd, 2004|12:55 pm]
[mood |confusedconfused]

The other day, my very last customers of the night bought almost $300 of baby stuff. Clothes, shoes, socks, diapers, etc. That's not really unusual, but what was, was the fact that they insisted on having a gift reciept with every single item... And another strange thing was that the register only allowed 11 gift reciepts per transaction (which I've never had happen before), so they had to make three seperate purchases to get all the stuff. Other thing was, they told me it wasn't even for them - they didn't have a kid. And they were extremely noncholant about the whole thing. "Oh, sure, we'll do three seperate reciepts. Sure, that's fine if it takes forever. That's okay, we just have to have gift receipts with everything, okay?"

I felt strange about it, and I let the manager know (she had to verify my gift-reiept problem), but neither of us could figure out a possible scam-in-the-works with what they were doing.

It could have been perfectly normal for them, but in all the time I've been at Walmart, it was a first for me.
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Love? Aisle Six. [Jul. 25th, 2004|12:17 am]
Myself: "So, did you find everything you were looking for?"
Male Customer: "Everything...except true love."
*slight pause*
I Say: "Well, if we did have any, it would come in bulk and probably not last very long."
Male Customer: "You do have a point."
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